A couple of weeks ago, I discovered a series of messages on purity given by Josh Harris. He is the man that several years ago wrote the book “I Kissed Dating Goodbye”. Since that time he has become senior pastor at Covenant Life Church in the Washington D.C. area. This is an excellent series for each of us to listen to because it lifts up the importance of sexual purity and magnifies God’s view of marriage. The messages, especially the first three or four, are straight forward and mince no words in the teaching that God created us as sexual beings and set the standards for living pure lives within the boundaries God has designed. I don’t know if I have ever heard this clear of instruction from the Word of God on this topic. I recommend the series for anyone who wants a deeper understanding of God’s intentions for our purity.
The series is in 6 parts and for now at least can be found and downloaded free of charge from the Covenant Life website here:
www.covlife.org/sermons
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
A Father's Love
One of the things I’m trying to do as I meditate on various passages of Scripture is to think through how it applies to the various roles I have as a man. Besides admonitions to me generally as a man, I consider how it affects me as a husband and then as a father.
If you’ve been following the previous posts you know that we have been thinking together about agape love. Peter had told us to add various traits to our faith with the pinnacle trait being love. We’ve thought a little bit together about this kind of love expressed toward our wife. I now want to think a little bit about what it means for a father to have this kind of love.
Love is patient. It bears long. It is mild and slow in seeking to get even. How are we doing in this area as a father? There’s a fine balance. We are to be patient and to bear long, but we are responsible to give our children the right kind of discipline and that usually means responding in a timely way to their poor behavior or disobedience.
Love is kind. We know what kindness is. Are we kind to our children? What about when they have been disobedient? God disciplines us with kindness. That doesn’t mean it’s easy to bear or doesn’t hurt. We need to treat our children with kindness and respect.
Love does not envy. It is not zealous and angry over some benefit, characteristic or skill the other person has. Are we being a good example in this area in our home?
Love does not puff itself up. A loving man will not act in a puffed up way toward his children. It’s not right first of all, and secondly, we don’t want to be the wrong kind of example for our children.
Love does not boast of ones abilities or extol his own virtues.
Love is not rude. It is not unbecoming and crude. As we relate to our children, we must behave in a way that is appropriate and becoming of a Christian. No rude or crude treatment of our children should be a part of our lives.
Love does not seek its own way. How hard is this one? We are supposed to be the leaders in our homes. We are to be the head. Doesn’t that mean we should seek our own way? The leadership we have should be a godly selfless leadership. This should be true as it relates to our children. We have the position where we could dictate virtually every decision in the family. However, love does not seek its own way. It’s ok to let the children have their way once in a while. I’m not talking about giving in to their misbehavior. I’m suggesting that if the kids want to go to McDonalds but you would rather have a Burger King, it doesn’t hurt to submit your will to theirs.
Love is not irritable. It is not easily stirred to anger nor is it easily riled up. Even though the behavior of my wife or children may be such that would rile up or stir up a natural man, these same events occurring in the life of a loving man will not rile him up.
Love is not resentful. It does not think evil of the other person or what the other person has done. Discipline and punishment should not come from a resentful heart or motive.
If you’ve been following the previous posts you know that we have been thinking together about agape love. Peter had told us to add various traits to our faith with the pinnacle trait being love. We’ve thought a little bit together about this kind of love expressed toward our wife. I now want to think a little bit about what it means for a father to have this kind of love.
Love is patient. It bears long. It is mild and slow in seeking to get even. How are we doing in this area as a father? There’s a fine balance. We are to be patient and to bear long, but we are responsible to give our children the right kind of discipline and that usually means responding in a timely way to their poor behavior or disobedience.
Love is kind. We know what kindness is. Are we kind to our children? What about when they have been disobedient? God disciplines us with kindness. That doesn’t mean it’s easy to bear or doesn’t hurt. We need to treat our children with kindness and respect.
Love does not envy. It is not zealous and angry over some benefit, characteristic or skill the other person has. Are we being a good example in this area in our home?
Love does not puff itself up. A loving man will not act in a puffed up way toward his children. It’s not right first of all, and secondly, we don’t want to be the wrong kind of example for our children.
Love does not boast of ones abilities or extol his own virtues.
Love is not rude. It is not unbecoming and crude. As we relate to our children, we must behave in a way that is appropriate and becoming of a Christian. No rude or crude treatment of our children should be a part of our lives.
Love does not seek its own way. How hard is this one? We are supposed to be the leaders in our homes. We are to be the head. Doesn’t that mean we should seek our own way? The leadership we have should be a godly selfless leadership. This should be true as it relates to our children. We have the position where we could dictate virtually every decision in the family. However, love does not seek its own way. It’s ok to let the children have their way once in a while. I’m not talking about giving in to their misbehavior. I’m suggesting that if the kids want to go to McDonalds but you would rather have a Burger King, it doesn’t hurt to submit your will to theirs.
Love is not irritable. It is not easily stirred to anger nor is it easily riled up. Even though the behavior of my wife or children may be such that would rile up or stir up a natural man, these same events occurring in the life of a loving man will not rile him up.
Love is not resentful. It does not think evil of the other person or what the other person has done. Discipline and punishment should not come from a resentful heart or motive.
Saturday, March 03, 2007
Loving our Wife, Continued
I’m still thinking about the importance of agape love in a marriage relationship especially as it relates to the husband’s role. As I read 1 Corinthians 13, my attention is focused on 9 concepts. I may come back and visit these in more detail in the future, but for now a short comment about each one will suffice.
Love is patient. It bears long. It is mild and slow in seeking to get even. So it’s important to ask myself how I am doing in this area. Do I carry grudges? Do I try to make sure everything is evened out? Hopefully not.
Love is kind. We know what kindness is. Am I kind to my wife? …all the time?
Love does not envy. It is not zealous and angry over some benefit, characteristic or skill the other person has. Are we being a good example in this area in our home?
Love does not puff itself up. A loving man will not bear himself in a cocky, arrogant way. He will not act and behave as though the whole world revolves around him. How are we doing guys?
Love does not boast of ones abilities or extol his own virtues.
Love is not rude. It is not unbecoming and crude. This is an area where we men have to be careful. We are not women and it is inappropriate to try to develop the softness of character that a woman has. However, there is no excuse for being rude or crude. Even though men are hardened and tough, we need to be able to treat our wife and family with kind politeness.
Love does not seek its own way. How hard is this one? We are supposed to be the leaders in our homes. We are to be the head. Doesn’t that mean we should seek our own way? The leadership we have should be a godly selfless leadership. We don’t need to get our own way unless our way is a godly way in contrast to a sinful or worldly way our wife might choose. But really, how often does that happen? God humbled Himself and took the position of a servant. This is God’s expectation for us as well.
Love is not irritable. It is not easily stirred to anger nor is it easily riled up. Even though the behavior of my wife or children may be such that would rile up or stir up a natural man, these same events occurring in the life of a loving man will not rile him up.
Love is not resentful. It does not think evil of the other person or what the other person has done. Colossians 3:19 tells us that we are to love our wife and not to be bitter or exasperated toward her.
Take some time to read and reread these basic 9 characteristics of godly, biblical love. How does your level of love stack up against the standard? If you’re like me, it doesn’t come close to being what God would like it to be. And yet, this is what Peter told us we should be diligent in adding our life.
Love is patient. It bears long. It is mild and slow in seeking to get even. So it’s important to ask myself how I am doing in this area. Do I carry grudges? Do I try to make sure everything is evened out? Hopefully not.
Love is kind. We know what kindness is. Am I kind to my wife? …all the time?
Love does not envy. It is not zealous and angry over some benefit, characteristic or skill the other person has. Are we being a good example in this area in our home?
Love does not puff itself up. A loving man will not bear himself in a cocky, arrogant way. He will not act and behave as though the whole world revolves around him. How are we doing guys?
Love does not boast of ones abilities or extol his own virtues.
Love is not rude. It is not unbecoming and crude. This is an area where we men have to be careful. We are not women and it is inappropriate to try to develop the softness of character that a woman has. However, there is no excuse for being rude or crude. Even though men are hardened and tough, we need to be able to treat our wife and family with kind politeness.
Love does not seek its own way. How hard is this one? We are supposed to be the leaders in our homes. We are to be the head. Doesn’t that mean we should seek our own way? The leadership we have should be a godly selfless leadership. We don’t need to get our own way unless our way is a godly way in contrast to a sinful or worldly way our wife might choose. But really, how often does that happen? God humbled Himself and took the position of a servant. This is God’s expectation for us as well.
Love is not irritable. It is not easily stirred to anger nor is it easily riled up. Even though the behavior of my wife or children may be such that would rile up or stir up a natural man, these same events occurring in the life of a loving man will not rile him up.
Love is not resentful. It does not think evil of the other person or what the other person has done. Colossians 3:19 tells us that we are to love our wife and not to be bitter or exasperated toward her.
Take some time to read and reread these basic 9 characteristics of godly, biblical love. How does your level of love stack up against the standard? If you’re like me, it doesn’t come close to being what God would like it to be. And yet, this is what Peter told us we should be diligent in adding our life.
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