Technology and the Christian - Part 20 Pornography

See past articles for context. (Part 1 here; Part 19 here)

With that background in mind, how does technology fit into the picture? Technology, whether it is TV, video, or Internet based can bring us realistic portrayals of sexual situations that in turn trigger the strong sexual desires that are built into us. With men, the strong desires that are aroused through what we see can be very powerful. The Bible calls these lusts. These lusts then can give rise to sin if not dealt with.

Jesus tells us that, “whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Matthew 5:28. From this simple statement we can see that Jesus' standard is very high. If we are to avoid this kind of potential sexual sin, we need to take precautions. Jesus' very next statement is to say that if our eye offends us, we should pluck it out. Now we could debate whether He was serious or whether He was using hyperbole to prove a point, but nevertheless, it's obvious He takes this very seriously and we should take whatever precautions we can to avoid this sort of sinning. The Apostle Peter wrote to his readers, “I beg you to abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul.” (I Peter 2:11) Peter knew that lusts and strong desires can actually make war against our very souls. We are to abstain from such lusts. They can harm us deep within our psyche. Paul told Timothy to flee from such lusts. So the admonition for us is to do whatever we can to avoid situations that produce these self-destructive lusts and cause them to flourish.

The problem with lust is that it is never satisfied. Sexual immorality of all kinds promises that it will meet the inner longings of our souls, but it never does. We are trapped into an ever deepening desire for more and the satisfaction we derive from our sin becomes less and less. God's secret to happiness is what Jesus taught the people in the Sermon on the Mount—"Happy is the man who hungers and thirsts for righteousness." While this seems totally foreign to the modern mind it is God's way of finding satisfaction. Do we believe God or the world system? Our direction and focus needs to be toward a life of righteousness.

In Ephesians 5:10, Paul tells us that we should find out what pleases the Lord. In verse 11 he tells us not to have any fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, and then in verse 12 he explains that it is shameful to even speak about things which are done by them in secret. In other words, there are things that displease God that people do in secret and it's shameful for Christians to even speak about these things.

So let's take these ideas and put them together. We as Christians are to avoid the immorality that is initiated in our minds by the things which we see; and we are to not even talk about the kinds of things that people do under the cover of darkness or in secret. Focusing our attention on these things can trigger strong desires that war on our souls and do great spiritual damage.

So what does that tell us about TV viewing for example? Doesn't this mean that we should take every precaution in our viewing to avoid those programs and commercials that either trigger immoral thoughts in our minds, or display or discuss immoral activities in detail? In this case, I'm not even talking about pornography. I'm just suggesting that we take great care not to become careless and accustomed to immorality and casual sexual content because in doing so, our own minds can become fertile ground for imagined sexual activity that Jesus condemns.

If these things are true, then what does that say about actual pornography? There's no question that exposure to graphic sexual material will produce strong sexual lusts in our minds and in our bodies that we cannot legitimately act upon from God's point of view. This being the case, we as Christian men need to take every precaution to avoid getting ourselves into the trap that pornography represents.

Technology itself can be addicting as we have discussed before. When you add pornography to the technology, you have a powerful mix. The Bible often speaks of diligence when it comes to the Christian life. It takes a great deal of diligence to avoid the entrapping nature of pornography. What are some of the things we can do to avoid the trap?

First I think we need to look at our lives to see if we really have the desire to live a life that is honoring to God no matter what the cost. This is where a lot of it falls down. We may claim that we are Christians, and we very well may be, but we don't really want to sacrifice the time and attention that it takes to live a consistent, biblical, righteous Christian life.

Second, we need to look at our personal spiritual disciplines carefully. Are we regularly taking the time to pray? Are we reading, studying and meditating on the Scriptures regularly? Are we regularly involved with other Christians in fellowship, prayer and ministry? If not, we are making ourselves vulnerable in many areas including our sexuality.

I've put together a summary of offensive and defensive strategies for fighting against the lusts which war against our soul. You can find it here.

In addition to making sure our Christian life is being supported the way it needs to be, here are some other steps you can take to increase accountability and provide protection for yourself and your family.

1. Make sure TV viewing is open and public within the home. Children should not have televisions in their rooms where they can watch what they want without supervision.
2. If you live alone and can't control what you watch, get rid of the TV. (Remember Jesus telling us to pluck out our eye or cut off our arm?)
3. Computer use should be open and public within the home. Children should not have computers with Internet access or DVD capabilities in their rooms.
4. Husbands, give your wife complete access to your computer, your browsing history, your Facebook passwords... everything.
5. Establish an accountability partner who has your permission to ask you anything he wants about your viewing and browsing habits.
6. If necessary, sign up for a filtering service that will email your browsing history to your wife or an accountability person.
7. If possible, avoid owning a smart phone. Under no circumstances should teenagers have a smart phone. That sounds radical, I know, but why do any of us have to have access to the Internet 24/7? Do you honestly think a 16 year old boy can keep away from pornography if he has Internet access on his phone where ever he is? Think about it!

PDF version of this entire series

Technology and the Christian - Part 19 Pornography

Previous articles - Part 1 here; Part 18 here

The Bible describes sexual sin with several different terms. One term, porneia, is used for any sexual sin that is outside of the norm and standard that God designed. The Greek word I referred to here you will recognize as the root word for our word pornography. Another Greek term is translated adultery and usually refers to sexual sin committed by a married person. Another couple of terms refer to sexual sin as uncleanness or lewdness. God uses all of these words to describe sins whereby we violate God's standard for our sexual behavior.

Let's look at some of the descriptions the Bible lays out. Let's start with what Jesus actually said. In Mark 7:21 Jesus, speaking about the fact that sin comes from within a man, says, “For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality (porneia, fornication),...adultery, ...sensuality (lewdness, sexual excess). All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.” Notice a couple of things here. First of all they come from within. The Bible says that the heart is deceitful and desperately wicked. (Jeremiah 17:9) So the source of our difficulty is not from the outside, but is from within. James writes that “each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death.”

Next we see that Jesus describes these actions as evil. Most of what happens sexually in our culture is not considered evil. The Bible has a different approach. Lastly we notice that they defile a person. We defile ourselves from what comes from within ourselves.

Paul, writing to the Romans in 13:13 says, “Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality (free and easy sex) and sensuality.” In the next verse he tells us to make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires. In other words, we should not make it easy to serve our lusts. Paul writes similar things to the Corinthians in 2 Corinthians 12:21.

To the Ephesians in 5:3 he writes, “But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking which are out of place. Be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.” In other words, God's wrath is coming because people engage in these behaviors. Why would we as Christians want to be a participant?

Finally, let's look at what the Apostle Peter wrote in his first letter. In 4:2 he says that we should live “no longer for human passions but for the will of God. The time that is past suffices for doing what the Gentiles want to do, living in sensuality (lewdness, sexual excess), passions, drunkenness, orgies, drinking parties, and lawless idolatry.” He is basically saying that we need to put our past behavior behind us and live for God from here on out. And the life we live for God is different than the description of our past life. Christians don't behave the same as non-Christians when it comes to sexuality.

Tomorrow, with that background in mind, we'll look at how technology fits into the picture and some strategies that may help us in the battle against sexual sin.

Part 20 available once it is published here.

PDF version of the entire series

Technology and the Christian - Part 18 Pornography

See previous articles in this series.  Part 1 here; Part 17 here

The final topic I'd like to cover in this series is the one that many of you may have thought would be the one that would come up first – pornography.

This article is primarily directed at men who are trying to be faithful followers of Jesus Christ. Some of you who may not be familiar with Jesus' teaching may find these thoughts unusual in light of the culture we live in today where virtually anything goes. As Christians we believe that the Bible is God's word to man, and a Christian man who is trying to be faithful to his Lord will try to govern his life according to God's will as given in the Bible.

The purpose of this series of articles has been to examine the relationship between technology and the Christian. However, I think that in order to explain the sexual implications of technology I need to lay the groundwork of a few principles from the Bible that I'm assuming in this discussion. Each of these ideas could generate a full chapter on their own, but I will just summarize them here.

The first thing we need to remember is that God created sex and sexuality. Sex in itself is not a dirty or vulgar thing. It is a God-given gift. Next we need to remember that God has told us in Scripture that sex is to be enjoyed, but that enjoyment is to be within the relationship of marriage between a man and a woman. All through the Bible the rightful sexual relationship within marriage is praised and held up as a joyful thing.

After Adam sinned, man's nature became sinful in all areas of his being and strong desires, which the Bible calls lusts, began to have a dominant force in a person's life. The Bible says that the strong desires of the body (or the flesh as the Bible describes it), the strong desires coming through our vision, and the pride of life are not from God the Father, but are part of the world system. (I John 2:16) These strong desires are very difficult to overcome and without the Spirit of God at work, it's almost impossible.

When a person comes to Christ, God gives him His Spirit and divine power to enable him to overcome these desires and to live a life that pleases God. We need to recognize that God has given us commands and directives because He is the one who created us and He knows best what is good for our well-being. We should never look at the commandments of God as though they were meant to spoil our fun. When we buy a product, a manufacturer will often enclose a list of instructions that shows the proper way to use the device. For example, we are perhaps not supposed to use the device in the water. It may cause damage to the device or injury to us. These are rules written by the ones who know best how things are supposed to work. The same is true of God's rules for us.

Tomorrow we'll look at the ways that the Bible describes various sexual sins.

Part 19 available once it's published here.

PDF version of the entire series

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 12

Finally, the last strategy in our battle against sexual immorality is to focus on Grace not law.

Sometimes people focus on the fact of God’s grace in the area of forgiveness and they sin frequently but claim God’s forgiveness just as frequently. Their behavior is very little different than that of unsaved people. God tells us in Titus 2 that the grace of God teaches us to deny ungodliness and worldly lusts and to live righteously and godly in this present world. If someone isn’t being taught those things but just continues on in his old ways, there is a question as to whether he actually has the grace of God in his life or not. This is a very serious issue each one of us should face in our own lives. Jesus said that not everyone who called Him Lord was saved.

So when I speak of grace, I’m not talking about what some call “cheap” grace. God’s grace changes people. It doesn’t leave them the same.

How then do we focus on grace rather than law in our pursuit of victory? I don’t have the time or space to draw this all out for you, but Romans 2:4 tells us that it is the goodness of God that leads to repentance. Titus 2:12 says that God’s grace teaches us to deny ungodliness.

Scripture also teaches that the law gives sin its power. The law is not sin and is good, but its purpose is to show how far short we come, not to enable us to do right. Look at Romans 7:7-12 for example. Paul says that he would not have known covetousness had it not been for the law. Once the law came, sin revived and “I died”.

See also 1 Corinthians 15:56 as well as Colossians 2:21-23. In the latter passage it speaks of human commandments. Sometimes we create our own set of commandments thinking that these will protect us, but notice that they are of no value against the indulgence of the flesh.

Focusing on the grace of God and His mercy and forgiveness will lead us in the direction away from the bondage of sin.

Habits are formed by repeatedly behaving in a certain way. You can create good righteous habits by making moment by moment decisions to do the right thing. You may not able to make a commitment to never look at pornography again, but you can make a decision not to look at it right now. In five minutes you can make the same decision again and little by little a good habit will form.

Enlist the help of another person who will help you be accountable. If you can’t find accountability in your spouse or dad, there are men in your church who would be very willing to help. It takes courage to ask, but as we’ve learned already, it is virtually a life and death decision on several levels.

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 11

Yet another strategy in the battle against sexual immorality in our lives is to recognize and live by the truth of 2 Corinthians 5:17. We are new creations. The old has passed away and all things have become new.

Consider these passages. I’ll just give them to you with a few comments and leave it to you to dig into them.

Romans 13:11-14 It’s time to wake up; the day is at hand. Since the day is at hand, we are to get rid of the dark, the old life, and put on the armor of light. Then take note of the whole list of things which need to be abandoned. Finally put on the Lord Jesus Christ and don’t make any provision for the flesh.

Notice the step of putting on Christ. This is a command. We need to make it a conscious action to ask God to help us put on Christ. We need to consciously put off the old and put on the new by faith.

1 Peter 4:1-4 In effect, since Christ suffered for us and we are in Him, we should have the same mind He had and put the past behind us. We “no longer should live the rest of our time in the flesh for the lusts of men, but for the will of God.” We have spent enough time in the old ways. It’s time to move forward for Christ.

Someone who has died is free of the temptation of sin. Peter’s argument here as well as Paul’s in Romans is that since we died with Christ, we should consider ourselves dead to sin. Our death has arrived, we are on the other side of it being raised with Christ and therefore we should reject sin’s attempts to have control.

Ephesians 4:17-24 We should no longer walk like the pagans. They have given themselves over to these sexual life-styles, but it is not that way for us as Christians. We need to put off that kind of life and be renewed in the spirit of our minds. We are to put on the new man which is created in true righteousness and holiness.

2 Corinthians 6:9-11 Paul asks us if we realize that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of heaven. Then he gives us a list of the kind of life-styles that will not make it to heaven. Then comes the word that this is what you were. God’s salvation changes us from what we were to something new.

Probably the most important thing to do is to immerse yourself in Scripture considering the passages listed here and meditate on them thoroughly and regularly.

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 10

Another strategy in the battle against sexual immorality in our lives is to flee. Second Timothy 2:2 tells us to flee youthful lusts. Sometimes God calls on us to stand and resist, but in this case the command is to flee. Flee by putting into practice the things discussed in this series of articles and flee to Christ and his Word. When a person flees, he is usually doing so out of fear. These are a group of sins that can take you down, so flee! They are against your body and they make war against your soul. (I Peter 2:11, Prov 6:27, I Corinthians 6:18)

Remember the story of Joseph? His master’s wife constantly enticed him to sleep with her and finally she caught a hold of him when her husband was gone. Joseph ran out of the house leaving his coat in her hands. This would have been the perfect opportunity to indulge his lusts, but instead he did the right thing and obeyed God even though the immediate consequence was to be put in prison.

Sometimes fleeing means to turn off the TV or use your computer right out in the open. Other times it means cancel your Internet service altogether or remove the TV from the house. Jesus said that it would be better to cut off our right hand rather than risk going to hell. (Matthew 5:30) We assume that is an exaggeration to make a point, but we not only won’t cut off our hand, we won’t even take much less drastic steps to shield ourselves from sin! Are we ever going to take any of this seriously?

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 9

Another front in the battle against sexual immorality is our control of our eyes. Job said in Job 31:1 that he had made a covenant with his eyes that he would not look on a woman. Jesus told us that to look on a woman with lust is the moral equivalent of committing adultery so this is not an insignificant thing. It makes some guys chuckle to think that we are “worried” about such little things, but if God takes it seriously, so should we.

David, in Psalm 101:3 says that he had made a pledge to set no wicked thing before his eyes. Both of these men provide good examples for us to follow. For most of us, temptation is strongest through the eyes. Therefore we have to purpose to avoid situations where temptation through the eyes would be a problem for us.

You need to decide whether you are serious about this or not. You know the kind of things that you see or think about that stirs your lusts and then you need to take an honest look at ways to limit those influences in your life.

Here are some possible areas:

TV and videos. Do you need to consider limiting your viewing time as well as content. Many Christians I know don’t watch programs that are unsuitable for their children. If your twelve year old shouldn’t watch it, then maybe you shouldn’t either.

Be careful not to be in areas were immodesty is prevalent – places such as beaches and water parks.

Magazines – Many men can’t safely browse through some of the popular magazines because of the immodest content.

Internet – Make sure everyone can see what you’re doing. Help your children out by making sure that you have access to their accounts and browsing history. If your children have Facebook or other similar social media, make sure that you are one of their friends.

Paul gives us summary advice when he tells us in Romans 13:14 not to make any provision for the flesh to fulfill its lusts. To make provision for something means to lay up supplies for something. We shouldn’t be setting up a storehouse of opportunities for our lust.

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 8

Last time I mentioned that one of the tactics for guarding ourselves against sexual immorality is to control our bodies. Let’s expand on that a little bit.

One of the key battle grounds is our mind. We are told in Romans 12:2 that we are to transformed by the renewing of our minds. This can only happen by spending time in God’s Word reading, memorizing and meditating on the Scriptures. Proverbs 23:7 says that as a man thinks in his heart, so he is. That’s why it’s so important to manage what we think. I put together a list of key verses that should be helpful in the discipline of memorization and meditation on Scripture. You can find that list here.

Philippians 4:8 is another key verse. This verse tells us that we are to think on things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous and praiseworthy. If you struggle in this area, it might be a worthwhile effort to take a serious and honest look at the things you think about and how that compares to the categories that are mentioned in this verse.

One other verse that I think is important to mention in this context is 2 Corinthians 10:5 where we are told to take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. Now there’s a challenge for you!

How serious are you about living the kind of life God wants you to live? The level of your seriousness will affect the amount of effort you put into steps such as these.

More next time.

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 7

God gives us many weapons in our fight against sexual immorality. The battle needs to be waged on many different fronts all at the same time and that is what makes it difficult.

1. We must recognized and by faith accept the fact that by God’s grace, the devil and sin have been defeated.

Hebrews 2:14 Inasmuch then as the children have partaken of flesh and blood, He Himself likewise shared in the same, that through death He might destroy him who had the power of death, that is, the devil, and release those who through fear of death were all their lifetime subject to bondage.

2. We need to have our bodies in subjection. 1 Corinthians 9:27 tells us that Paul disciplines his body and brings it into subjection. That means he controlled his body and not the other way around. In Romans 6:12 Paul says that we should not allow sin to reign in our mortal body that we should obey its lusts. He then goes on to say that we should not present our members to sin to be used as weapons against us. And finally, God will not permit us to be tempted above what we are able. (1 Corinthians 10:6) That means that with God’s Spirit in us, we are able to have victory. Sin shall not have dominion over you. (Romans 6:14)

It amazes me that we as men want to be strong. We often brag about our strength and our ability to defeat others in an athletic event or in perhaps even a real war scenario. And yet, even with that macho attitude in those areas, we are wimps when it comes to allowing sin and the devil to push us over with barely an ounce of resistance on our part.

We’ll discuss a couple of other battle tactics next time.

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 6

We are considering three ideas which will help us gain biblically-based thought patterns regarding sexual sin. Today we discuss the third point.

Sexual sins are among the reasons why the wrath of God is coming upon mankind. (Ephesians 5:3-7; Colossians 3:5-7) Notice the references to these sins in these passages. Look at what Ephesians 5:5 says. “For this you know, that no fornicator, unclean person nor covetous man, who is an idolater, has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.” And don’t miss the fact that sexual sins are not the only kind of sins mentioned here. This is a strong statement. Do you believe it?

What some people don’t realize is that these sins themselves are the wrath of God on display. With your Bible open to Romans 1:18 and following, answer the following questions:

Vs 18 Is the wrath of God present or future in this verse?

Vs 24 What did God do in his wrath? He gave them up to what?

Vs 26 God gave them up still further as part of His wrath. What did He give them up to in this verse?

Vs 28-32 Then look at the list as God gives them up still further.

What you’ll find in this short Bible study is that part of God’s judgment doesn’t involve sending down fire from heaven. It involves letting people go into their sin and have their own way. Much of that sin is sexual.

So you need to ask yourself, “Do I want to participate in activities that are part of the reason God’s judgment is going to come?” And, “Do I want to participate in activities that in themselves demonstrate that God’s judgment is already here?”

To me, these are very sobering questions for the Christian man to contemplate.

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 5

We are considering three ideas which will help us gain biblically-based thought patterns regarding sexual sin.

The second point to consider is that sexual sin is sin against both our body and soul. These sins are at war with us. Will we fight back or assume a complacent position? Even if we don’t fight backy, they will still war against us and ultimately destroy us

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 – He who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body! Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?

The seriousness of this is based on the fact that our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. Just think about that! If you are a Christian your body – your hands, head, arms, feet – your physical body is the temple of God!

Peter tells us to abstain from fleshly lusts which war against our soul. (1 Peter 2:11) These sins make war against the core of your being. Take a good look at Proverbs 6:25-27. Notice the damage that sexual immorality causes.

When we get involved with porn or have an immoral relationship with someone we are taking death into our souls. Our problem is that we either don’t really believe this or we don’t care. Either way we need to take a careful look at our salvation and examine ourselves to see if we are in the faith. (2 Corinthians 13:5)

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 4

In the last article on sexuality, I gave you a list of sexual sins spoken of in the Bible along with the definitions. As we consider sexual sins, it seems to me that pornography is probably the most addicting and soul-damaging of sexual sins. The Greek word used for sexual immorality was pornea. Add the ending graphy to it which means image or writing and you have sexual immorality in images or in writing. As we study the Scriptural teaching on sexual sins and God’s way of victory, keep in mind that we are including pornography in this discussion.

I’d like to consider three ideas that will help us regain a biblical perspective on sexual sins. We’ll look at the first this time, and then the others in future articles.

1. According to Jesus, what is the source of sexual sins? In Mark 7:20 Jesus tells us that these sins come out of the heart of man. TV and Internet provide the temptation, but even before these were invented, temptation and sin were there in full force. We need to recognize and take responsibility for the fact that our hearts are sinful and deceitful. That’s why we need a savior.

James tells us that we shouldn’t think our temptations come from God. He tells us that we are tempted when we are drawn away of our own lusts and enticed. James 1:14-15 Stop blaming other situations and factors and take responsibility for your own sin.

According to Galatians 5:19 these sins are the works of the flesh. They come from our flesh, our own natural self. The world and Satan use this natural tendency to drawn them out and trap us.

Jeremiah 17:9 says that the heart is deceitful above all things, who can know it?

In 1 Corinthians 10:12 Paul explains how the people in the Old Testament fell through disbelief and then warns us to be careful because when we think we stand, we may fall.

With a deceitful heart as the source of these sins, it is foolishness to think we can trust ourselves. People of high standing and seeming great intelligence are falling prey to sexual temptation and sin and ruining their reputations and careers along with it. What makes us think we can put ourselves in situations where the temptations are great and accountability is limited? We need to have the attitude expressed in Philippians 3:3 which is that we “have no confidence in the flesh.” It’s good to have a certain amount of distrust in our ability to deal with such a strong enemy.

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 3

We are examining what the Bible has to say about sex and sexuality.

Consider this statement: Sexual activity outside of God’s prescribed plan for marriage is sin. Doesn’t that go against the trend we’re seeing all around us every day? Some non-Christians say that we believe this because we think sex is dirty or we’re repressed or have some other psychological problem. As I mentioned in a previous post, God is the inventor of sex and Christians ought to have the most realistic accepting view of sexuality that there is in the world. But God has placed boundaries on our sexual activity for our good and for His glory and we as Christians are called upon to accept those boundaries and enjoy sexuality within them.

God speaks about sexual sins in various ways in the Bible. Often when people read the Bible, they don’t know what those words mean and so don’t make the connection to activities described in other ways in modern English. So what I’d like to do is to define some of those words for you and give you the references for them.

Fornication: From the Greek word pornea – Sexual sin of a general kind not limited to a specific behavior, but outside of marriage between a man and woman. Mark 7:20ff; 2 Corinthians 12:21; Galatians 5:19; Ephesians 5:3; Colossians 3:5

Adultery: Having sex with someone other than your spouse. Mark 7:20; Galatians 5:19

Lasciviousness: Also translated wantonness, lewdness or sensuality. It means unrestrained behavior in moral behavior and attitudes. Mark 7:20; Romans 13:13; 2 Corinthians 12:21

Concupiscence: Also translated lust, it is a strong desire, longing or covetousness. Colossians 3:5; 1 Peter 4:3

Uncleanness: Also translated impurity. It is sexual impurity or uncleanness. (Everyone understands what we mean by “dirty” joke.) 2 Corinthians 12:21; Galatians 5:19; Ephesians 4:19

Revelings: Orgies, revelry, drinking parties, carousing. Romans 13:13; Galatians 5:19; 1 Peter 4:3

Coarse jesting: Crude joking. Crude and vulgar joking. Ephesians 5:3

Hopefully these definitions will help you put some of the Bible’s terminology in a perspective you can understand.

Biblical Manhood - Sexuality Part 2

We’re discussing sex and sexuality in light of Scripture. The last time we pointed out that sex was created by God for our good and His glory. In an effort to avoid sinful sexual behaviors, Christians have often avoided the topic entirely and sometimes look at the whole subject as dirty or vulgar. God does not look at it that way.

In Hebrews 13:4 we are told that it’s God’s plan that marriage and the marriage bed be honored and undefiled. God devotes a whole book of the Bible, Song of Solomon, to love and marriage. God is not embarrassed or shy about this topic.

God does not leave us helpless in the face of His commands concerning sexuality. He has given marriage as the relationship which is meant to provide for sexuality and to protect us from sexual temptation. Rather than looking at marriage as though it were a form of bondage, we should see it as a blessing from God meant to provide for us and to protect us.

In 1 Corinthians 7:1 we read, “It is not good for a man to touch a woman.” The word “touch” means “to hold on to.” It is not good to have the kind of physical contact with a woman that is reserved for a spouse.

This brings up the issue of defrauding. The Bible tells us that we should not defraud one another in the area of sexual attraction. “Defrauding” is the act of making the other person think or feel that further sexual intimacy is coming when there is no intention of going that far. (See also I Thessalonians 4:1-7) It is wrong to touch another person in a way that initiates sexual feelings when there is no intention of proceeding further. And there should be no intention of proceeding further if the person is not your spouse.

Young people don’t naturally know this and it is essential that this be part of the discussion we as Christian parents have with our children at appropriate times in their life.

Verse 2 of 1 Corinthians 7 teaches us that because of the reality of sexual immorality and sexual temptation, each person is to have his/her own spouse. Our husband or wife was given to us by God for protection.

Verses 3-6 teach us that even for a person who is married, Satan can tempt us because of our natural lack of self control and therefore a husband and wife should not deprive each other of physical intimacy except for short periods given over to prayer.

If you are not a Christian, this probably doesn’t make any sense, but for us whose goal it is to please God as best we can in all areas of life, this is important teaching. Husbands and wives often put each other in serious danger because they are not attentive to their spouse in this area. This is as much sinful behavior as any other disobedience of God’s will for our lives.

Our effort to be godly Christians encompasses every area of life. God doesn’t just throw out a lot of commands and then expect us to try to live up to it. He is lovingly interested in us and wants our best. He is the one who created us and so He knows best how to live life in a way that brings the most enjoyment and satisfaction. Don’t let the world influence you so much that you begin to buy into its philosophy. Take God’s Word seriously, meditate on it frequently and let it have its affect on your life.

Biblical manhood - Sexuality Part 1

No aspect of life is probably more difficult for Christian men than that of sexual purity. The temptation to go where we shouldn’t go, look at what we shouldn’t look at and listen to what we shouldn’t listen to in order to satisfy our interest and curiosity about sex is strong.

Non-Christians who read this article will find this statement ludicrous because most people don’t see any need to curb or inhibit any sexual expression of any kind.

God has many things to say about this topic in His Word. He has made us as sexual beings. Sex was His idea and when used within His plan and boundaries glorifies God and brings good to our lives. Within God’s plan, sex is not vulgar, dirty or sinful. God has prescribed marriage between a man and a woman as the proper relationship for sexual intimacy.

Within this series of lessons on Biblical Manhood we have been faced with the fact that we must study what God says in His Word and then face the decision as to whether we are going to believe Him or not. In the area of sexuality, the culture makes it very difficult because we are bombarded with sexual messages everywhere we turn. These messages do not support God’s point of view. Little by little we become more accustomed to the world’s way and God’s way seems more and more out of touch.

Therefore, I believe the best thing for us to do is to immerse ourselves in what the Bible teaches us about this subject. In the next several blog posts on Biblical Manhood, we will explore what God has to say about sex and sexuality.

To get us started then, let’s consider the fact that sexuality and marriage are of God for our good and His glory. The fact that sex is part of the display of God’s glory is hardly ever considered. God made man and woman for each other and pronounced the relationship good.
Genesis 1:27 – Male and female He created them.
Genesis 1:28 – He told them to be fruitful and multiply
Genesis 1:31 – God saw that everything He had made was very good
Genesis 2:18 – The thing that wasn’t good was for man to be alone. God was not content to see the man without a helper that was suitable and fitting for him. Therefore He created the woman and brought her to the man and then gave the command to be fruitful and multiply.

We’ll discuss further considerations of this topic in the next Biblical Manhood posting.

Sexual Purity

A couple of weeks ago, I discovered a series of messages on purity given by Josh Harris. He is the man that several years ago wrote the book “I Kissed Dating Goodbye”. Since that time he has become senior pastor at Covenant Life Church in the Washington D.C. area. This is an excellent series for each of us to listen to because it lifts up the importance of sexual purity and magnifies God’s view of marriage. The messages, especially the first three or four, are straight forward and mince no words in the teaching that God created us as sexual beings and set the standards for living pure lives within the boundaries God has designed. I don’t know if I have ever heard this clear of instruction from the Word of God on this topic. I recommend the series for anyone who wants a deeper understanding of God’s intentions for our purity.

The series is in 6 parts and for now at least can be found and downloaded free of charge from the Covenant Life website here:

www.covlife.org/sermons