One of the things I’m trying to do as I meditate on various passages of Scripture is to think through how it applies to the various roles I have as a man. Besides admonitions to me generally as a man, I consider how it affects me as a husband and then as a father.
If you’ve been following the previous posts you know that we have been thinking together about agape love. Peter had told us to add various traits to our faith with the pinnacle trait being love. We’ve thought a little bit together about this kind of love expressed toward our wife. I now want to think a little bit about what it means for a father to have this kind of love.
Love is patient. It bears long. It is mild and slow in seeking to get even. How are we doing in this area as a father? There’s a fine balance. We are to be patient and to bear long, but we are responsible to give our children the right kind of discipline and that usually means responding in a timely way to their poor behavior or disobedience.
Love is kind. We know what kindness is. Are we kind to our children? What about when they have been disobedient? God disciplines us with kindness. That doesn’t mean it’s easy to bear or doesn’t hurt. We need to treat our children with kindness and respect.
Love does not envy. It is not zealous and angry over some benefit, characteristic or skill the other person has. Are we being a good example in this area in our home?
Love does not puff itself up. A loving man will not act in a puffed up way toward his children. It’s not right first of all, and secondly, we don’t want to be the wrong kind of example for our children.
Love does not boast of ones abilities or extol his own virtues.
Love is not rude. It is not unbecoming and crude. As we relate to our children, we must behave in a way that is appropriate and becoming of a Christian. No rude or crude treatment of our children should be a part of our lives.
Love does not seek its own way. How hard is this one? We are supposed to be the leaders in our homes. We are to be the head. Doesn’t that mean we should seek our own way? The leadership we have should be a godly selfless leadership. This should be true as it relates to our children. We have the position where we could dictate virtually every decision in the family. However, love does not seek its own way. It’s ok to let the children have their way once in a while. I’m not talking about giving in to their misbehavior. I’m suggesting that if the kids want to go to McDonalds but you would rather have a Burger King, it doesn’t hurt to submit your will to theirs.
Love is not irritable. It is not easily stirred to anger nor is it easily riled up. Even though the behavior of my wife or children may be such that would rile up or stir up a natural man, these same events occurring in the life of a loving man will not rile him up.
Love is not resentful. It does not think evil of the other person or what the other person has done. Discipline and punishment should not come from a resentful heart or motive.
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